What Overspending Might Be Trying to Tell You…
In my last article, I talked about what it feels like when your financial life is just a little off—when your spending doesn’t quite reflect what matters most, even if everything looks “fine” on paper.
This week, I want to stay with that feeling a little longer. Because one of the most common ways misalignments shows up is through overspending.
Overspending is often treated like a character flaw—something we fix with more structure or stricter budgets. But in my experience, it’s often just a signal. A gentle pull asking us to pay attention. And when we’re willing to get curious instead of critical, it can point us back toward what really matters.
✴️ Overspending Draws Our Attention
Overspending isn’t random. It usually shows up when something in us wants to be acknowledged—a need for comfort, a moment of ease, a desire for something beautiful or grounding.
That doesn’t make the behavior ideal. But it does mean that the spending isn’t the full story. It’s often a response to something we haven’t yet named.
When someone shares that they’ve been overspending, I don’t focus on the purchase itself. I gently ask, How did it feel afterward? And how did it feel a week later? That’s where the insight lives—not in the item, but in what the experience reveals.
✴️ Why Budgeting Alone Can Feel Frustrating
Budgeting is a helpful tool. But when used on its own—without clarity or context—it can feel like trying to hold water in your hands. You might be tracking, cutting, trying your best… but if your spending patterns are drawing your attention elsewhere, those efforts won’t fully land.
That’s why overspending isn’t something to “correct” right away. It’s something to learn from.
What are you being pulled toward? What’s quietly asking for more attention, space, or care?
✴️ What Overspending Might Be Telling You
Sometimes it’s a longing for rest. Sometimes it’s the need to feel free, even momentarily. Other times, it’s just the desire to feel good when everything else feels hard.
And while we don’t want to live from those impulses alone, we also don’t need to judge them. Because when we slow down and notice, we often find a thread that leads us back to our values. That thread might be clarity. Or relief. Or the desire to feel more like yourself again.
The spending isn’t wrong—it just might not be fully aligned. And that’s a starting point, not a failure.
✴️ A Different Kind of Clarity
Instead of asking, “Why can’t I stick to a budget?”, try asking:
- If my spending had a voice, what would it be trying to reveal about what I most want?
- What does the rhythm of my spending say about the rhythm of my life in this season?
- Looking at how I’ve been spending, what am I most craving?
These questions aren’t about guilt. They’re about understanding where your attention is naturally going—and whether your money can begin to support that more intentionally.
✴️ Where We’re Headed Next
Of course, there are seasons where even that kind of reflection feels out of reach—when the focus is survival, not alignment. And when the only financial question is: How can I pay this bill?
In the next article, I’ll share what it looks like to hold on to agency in those seasons—when money is tight, choices feel limited, and the numbers don’t quite work. Because even then, intention still matters.